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By Peter Winton
On a warm evening more conducive to enjoying several cold ales, Mildura's club cyclists chose to do otherwise. Yelta's finest cyclist, or is that Seer, commented, "With the best view in the State just a few hundred metres away (being the Riverside Golf Club's bbq area) and cold beer on tap, what the hell are we doing here?" To date there is no rational answer to that question, none that make any sense anyway. A good crowd gathered, girlfriends of riders, Kris Cerini of Bikes & Trikes among others. The Club's unannounced policy of soliciting spectators is working!
24 kilometres, 3 laps of the Riverside circuit was the programmed event. Barry Pollock, who rode his bike to the event at last, decided on a novel approach to the scoring for the "race of strewth". Riders would be paired up for aggregation of their times and with a little tweaking by handicaps championship points would be determined. As always there are the fortunate few and the unfortunate majority. In this regard the Club's fastest rider, Kevin Tankard, drew the Club's most out of form rider (me).
Perhaps this is the right time to attempt some in-house humor, as there's little else to brag about. On the subject of "awards" our very own "Roy & HG" might consider the following:
Dr Anderson be awarded the "Italian job" trophy for the tracheitis he cannot shake off. This little bug is direct from Italy and even with Arthur's access to the purest grade of pharmaceuticals he is unable to exorcise his demon. Peter Mulhearn must surely be recognised for the "Gucci" award, decked out in brilliant red lycra for his maiden voyage with the Club and looking the complete picture with a rear disc wheel with and deep dish front end, pretty Ferrari colours, how Grand Prix!
Rob McNally must be the only contender for the "Dolly" award after cloning his red Cannondale and allowing the result to pass to Kevin Tankard (and he took it!). To Michael Vaughan the "Gandalf" or "Wizard Cup" for peering into a crystal ball and deciding to stay home, he surely foresaw a broken chain or the like after his recent bout of misfortunes.
To Peter Winton the "Titanic" for that is how far his form has slumped this last month or so. To Jack Lokan the prize is a "poetic licence" for coining the phrase "a three-lapper…..what a crapper". Ken Joy should receive the "Tollway" gift for heading in the wrong direction (towards the carpark, or was it the Bar?) before the event. Ian Brade gets a gong as the "Pale Rider" for his pommy suntan. Ian might be a contestant for the "Gucci" as well with his colorful display. Reece Homfray is acknowleged also for the "Taxidermist" coz that's how he looked afterwards. Peter Mills may well be the Phantom (the ghost who rides) as he makes little or no sound as he goes about his business. Kevin Tankard could be the "Alien" as we know he's not human!
There are others but to deal with them all here would put Roy & HG on the redundancy list.
This Sunday is a 48km road race at Gol Gol and the whisper is the old silver fox will be among us.
Kevin Tankard 34.16 Peter Mulhearn 1.13 Peter Mills 1.36 Rob McNally 2.20 Baudry 2.29 Ian Brade 2.38 Dr Anderson 3.02 Wells 3.20 Jack Lokan 4.28 Peter Winton 4.52 Wightwick 4.58 Ken Joy 6.14 Aylward 7.29 Reece Homfrey 10.44 Teams: Lokan/Mulhearn 69.23 aggregate
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